


By the Seashore

by CynziDragonPazza



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Bad Jokes, Dirty Talk, Fluff and Smut, Light Bondage, M/M, Outdoor Sex, Post-Canon, dorks being dorks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-14
Updated: 2017-05-14
Packaged: 2018-10-31 13:37:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10900446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CynziDragonPazza/pseuds/CynziDragonPazza
Summary: Happily living together on Consort Island, Jake gets a particular idea in his head when taking a walk that he just can't wait to try out. Dirk really can't say no to it. Not that he wants to, either.





	By the Seashore

The warm hands that slid under the sunglasses were callused from years of exploration and gun practice. “Guess who~”

He'd know that honey sweet voice even if he had gone blind, deaf, and mute. That didn't mean he couldn't play along. “The hands aren’t gray, so you’re not a troll...your voice is male...John, why are you here?”

Guffawing met his ears as the hands slipped away. Dirk leaned his head back with a grin to see Jake returning it, dark green eyes sparkling with mirth. “Oh, please, chum, I’m ten times more handsome than him,” he teased.

“Understatement of the fucking century, angel.” Warmth flooded his heart at the peck to his nose Jake bestowed upon him. “So what brings you to my humble abode?”

“We live together, you dork,” Jake teased. A different sparkle appeared in his eyes, something a little more mischievous. “I was strolling down to the beach for a bit, since you were taking so goshdamned long in the shower, and I had an  _ idea _ .”

One slim blond eyebrow quirked up over the shades. “What kind of idea?”

Jake bounced around Dirk’s chair to sit on the table and face Dirk. “I was looking at the cliffs, see, and i couldn’t help but notice that near ground level were areas perfect to tie a few ropes…~”

Dirk chewed on his bottom lip in thought. Jake just looked so damn puppy-eager that he almost immediately said yes. Still, he hesitated. He had always been a private sort of person, and that extended to their romps. Kitchen or living room sex was one thing, but actually being outside? Where anyone could see them? Not to mention the elements. A flash of a sunburn with white lines marking where ropes and hands had held him in place crossed his mind, and he suddenly snorted. Catching Jake’s pout he quickly said, “No, no, I just had a funny thought. But I don’t know, I mean...outside? What if a consort or something saw us?”

Jake relaxed a bit. “The spot I found is a small cove, it takes a bit to even find the path. We’d be completely out of sight! Please, Dirk? A trial run! Just to test.”

It was Dirk’s turn to pout. “Using please  _ and _ my first name? That’s dirty and you know it.” Jake just snickered.

That was how Dirk found himself pressed against surprisingly smooth stone, shirtless, hands stretched over his head as Jake double checked that the knots weren’t preventing blood flow. He was surprised at just how isolated the cove was, pleasantly so. The sea lapping at the beach not too far away left the strong scent of salt in his nose. He could feel his pulse, just a little quicker than normal, against the ropes. The sand was soft between his toes.

“You alright there, chap?” Jake stroked Dirk’s cheek lightly, pulling him out of his thoughts. He nodded and Jake smiled in that particular way that turned his insides into jelly. “If we go too far?”

“What pumpkin,” Dirk replied. He suddenly smirked mischievously. “Does that make you my guardian angel?”

Jake did his best to look stern, even with his lips trying to twitch upwards. “Just for that you lost your shades privileges.”

“Aw come on man, not the shades. I need them to at least try and look cool and aloof. As much as I can all tied up and on display like a Christmas goose,” he added, blinking as the world brightened.

Jake tucked the shades away in his sylladex and turned back to Dirk, grinning when he noticed the other squirming subtly. “Well, if you  _ really _ feel that way, should we give you some stuffing?” he purred, stepping just close enough to brush his lips along Dirk’s jawline. When the blond tried to press his body against Jake’s the brunet took just the slightest step back to stay out of range. The little frustrated huff drew out a low chuckle in response. “Ah ah, don’t be so friggin’ impatient, Strider, I promise you’ll feel so dadblasted good your head’ll spin.”

“Not literally, I hope.” Dirk gave the unamused Jake a cheeky grin. “I mean, unless this goes fucking pear shaped.”

“Jesus christopher kringlefucker, do I have to gag you already?”

There was a glint in those pretty orange eyes Jake loved so. “Maybe.”

“If you’re so eager for one, maybe I should just say no,” Jake hummed. His hand reached out and he started tracing shapes on Dirk’s wiry torso with the lightest touch. He drank in the resulting shiver and continued. “I should just keep doing this, make you squirm and draw all those pretty noises out of that darling mouth of yours, until someone hears and wonders just what I’m doing to you.” Dirk shuddered, and the flush that was making his freckles stand out only spurred Jake on. “I wonder…” His fingertips trailed up Dirk’s chest, resting lightly on the fluttering pulse along his slender neck. “Could I make you  _ scream _ ?”

Even with the growing pressure against his pants, Dirk managed a smirk. “I hope so.”

Jake couldn’t resist. He kissed him hard and hot and fast, pressing against him with a nip at Dirk’s lips. The blond immediately returned the kiss with a needy groan as he pressed back. There was frustration at not being able to wrap his arms around his boyfriend, but wasn’t that part of the appeal? Jake cupping his face to keep him in place until he said otherwise only served to add another thrill of heat to his groin.

The heated kisses continued, tongues entwined, only breaking when Jake decided to map a trail along Dirk’s jawline. His hand trailed down to grip his hip with a deceptively gentle hand. One particular nibble at the spot just under his ear made Dirk keen softly. Jake smirked briefly against the skin. He still knew all the spots to turn him into a quivering pile of mush. “I don’t even know why you’d want me to gag you,” he murmured between nips down the slender neck. “I frigging  _ love _ hearing how discombobulated you get, babbling and prattling on without a care.”

“You’re such a fucking damn tease anyway,” Dirk moaned, leaning his head back against the stone. “How’m I supposed to even keep my wits when you’re just making me all hot and bothered without any kind of relea _ aaaaah~ _ ”

Jake grinned, white teeth flashing like a predator’s. “What’s the matter, you sound a little jingle-brained there, love.”

“I-I wonder why--” Another sharp moan was drawn out of Dirk as Jake bit hard at the crook of his neck, hand moving tantalizingly slow up and down his dick. “Fuck, Jake…”

“Hold your horses, we’ll get there,” he all but cooed with a nip to Dirk’s earlobe. “In fact, if you’re able to be darb for me, you’ll get a little treat~”

Dirk all but whimpered, gripping the rope tightly as his knees grew weak. “Ye-yeah, yeah, I can do that, definitely, just tell me what you want and I’ll do it--”

“First, stop beating your gums,” Jake snapped. He wasn’t actually mad, but the tone was enough to make Dirk shut up with a sharp  _ click _ of teeth. He smiled. “Second,  _ relax _ . Can you at least do that for me?”

“...Oh, I can speak?” Dirk yelped at the sudden hard smack to an ass cheek, which Jake kept a hold of even as he kept stroking Dirk inside his pants. “I mean, yeah, absolutely, I can do that Jake--”

“Sir.”

Oh, they were going  _ that _ route now. Dirk’s knees nearly buckled at the authority in Jake’s voice if not for the fact that he was almost literally being held up by rope and Jake’s hands. He swallowed hard. “Yes, sir.”

“Good boy,” Jake murmured, granting him a sweet kiss. “I should tan your hide for being so cheeky, but I know you’d like that too much.” The disappointed twist of Dirk’s mouth made him laugh and cover it with his own.

The kiss was brief before Jake moved to more pressing matters down south. Kneeling, Jake made quick work of those pesky pants, sliding them down agonizingly slow. When his cock was subsequently free of its constraints a downright filthy moan dripped from Dirk’s mouth. Jake simply hummed, pleased. “Oh, gods, Jake…”

“A- _ hem _ .”

“Sir, sorry, I meant sir--aiyp!”

“That’s your only warning,” Jake said, taking a moment to admire the hickey blossoming on Dirk’s inner thigh. He glanced upwards and smirked. The blond was flushed, with love bites growing darker down his neck, and soft little pants filling the air. His hair was pleasingly askew and the need he was feeling was so overwhelmingly evident in dark orange eyes that Jake felt his own cock twitch against the seam of his shorts. “Think you can behave?” An eager nod. “Good.”

The slow slide of a tongue up his dick made Dirk shudder and tug at the ropes with a long low moan. “Oh fuck, fuck, shit, J-- _ mmph _ !” Before he could disobey he bit his lip hard, quivering with the effort not to say anything to piss Jake off. A very pleased chuckle came from the brunet between his knees, and the sudden reward of a hot mouth wrapped fully around his dick made Dirk let out a ridiculous keen that normally would’ve embarrassed the fuck out of him. He pulled at the ropes in a desperate desire to grip Jake’s hair or  _ something _ , hips being forcefully held in place by his boyfriend. His toes curled in the sand and his head almost bounced painfully against the stone when he tossed it back with another moan. He wasn’t quite at the point of mindless babbling just yet, he had enough semblance of control on himself, but fuck it was starting to reach that pinnacle where he could so easily tip over. 

Of course, Jake wasn’t exactly making it easy either, considering how he was so sinfully perfect with how to use that tongue along his length and moving his head at an even pace, just keeping him near the edge but not yet enough to reach sweet orgasm. He was almost shaking when Jake suddenly stopped and pulled off of him with a soft  _ pop _ . Before he could stop it a whimper escaped the blond.

Jake had to keep himself from scrambling desperately up to his feet, managing to be smooth or at the very least not trip over his own feet. His original plan had been to rile Dirk up to high heaven, but it sort of backfired in the most hilarious way and made him just as eager. He undid his shorts and shoved them just far enough down that they wouldn’t be an issue before he pushed himself flush against Dirk, kissing him hard with a groan when their hips made contact. He felt the full-body shiver ripple against his own at the touch. He didn’t try to stop Dirk from grinding up against him, but instead reached down to take both of them in hand. 

He took the briefest of moments to decaptchalogue a bottle of lube and slick themselves up beforehand though. Experience had taught them both that dry hands stroking dicks made for painful friction. The groans were lost in the seemingly forever-lasting kiss and before he knew it Dirk had managed to hitch a knee on his hip. Jake laughed into the other’s mouth and broke the kiss to hide his face in the crook of his neck, free hand resting on said knee. He could feel the tension in the other’s body, how taut the muscles were, and it filled him with a ridiculous thrill that he could make  _ Dirk _ of all people come undone at his hands. It was a heady feeling, having so much control. He peppered Dirk’s neck with kisses, up to his ear, hand still moving quickly. “Come for me, Dirk.”

With a near-shout of Jake’s name Dirk flung his head back, yelping suddenly when it actually bonked against the stone. Jake was momentarily distracted with his own orgasm, Dirk’s name muffled against flushed skin. They both fell back against the rock wall with gasps for much-needed oxygen. Dirk’s lashes kept fluttering. “...Ow.”

“Oh cheese and fucking crackers, are you alright there, sweetheart?” Jake’s clean hand slipped up to carefully rub and probe at the particular spot. No blood, thankfully. Just a small bump that'll go away in a few minutes thanks to God Tier magicks. Once reassured he sighed softly and pulled away just enough to look him in the eye with a smile. “So, properly satisfied?”

Dirk managed a breathy laugh as Jake carefully untied one wrist. “Not completely. We have to test this idea of outdoor sex more than once, you know. It's important to be empirical.”

Jake simply nodded, gently rubbing the soreness out of his wrist with furrowed brows. The focus on making sure he was okay was enough to make him lean forward and kiss his forehead. He was rewarded with a soft sweet heart melting smile and kisses pressed along the impressions in his skin. “Sure, we can do that, sweetheart.”

When his other wrist was freed he nearly fell into the sand if not for Jake catching him so easily. “I'm alright, I promise, just a little weak-kneed. Which is completely your fault by the way, the sheer ravishment you inflicted on me has me ruined for any other man, have pity on this poor southern belle. I expect you to take responsibility for the loss of my virtue.” Jake’s snort of laughter prompted Dirk to start snickering as well, the two of them crumbling onto the sand in a pile of laughs and partially-pulled on clothes.

When the giggles subsided Jake cupped Dirk’s cheek gently. “How do you feel, sweetheart? Alright?”

“Yeah, I'm good. Really good.” He leaned forward to kiss Jake with a rush of affection. When he pulled away though he was smirking. “I didn't scream though,  _ sir. _ ”

Jake’s smile turned downright dangerous. “Oh, pet, I think we can fix that with two shakes of the tail.”

* * *

 

”...Jake. Look at this.”

“What--oh for chrissakes!”

“Stop laughing, god tier won't make tan lines go away quickly! How am I supposed to go hang with my bro when I have very blatant evidence of you fucking my brains out on my wrists?”

“I dunno--haha--gloves?”

“No, this has just gone fucking pear-shaped, you're gonna have to decapitate me.”

“Nah, this just means we have to have our romps at the beach without rope for a while until your tan evens out. Oh stop pouting, you can survive that long!”

**Author's Note:**

> This was a Valentine's gift for a very good friend of mine! I hope they love it! And this is the first time I've written Dirk or Jake so I really hope I got their characters down. Comments and kudos are always welcome!


End file.
